Wednesday, August 26, 2009

INGLORIOUS BASTERD

Ted Kennedy died late Tuesday night at 77. For a clockwork orange time-line to the NBC late show hosted by Boston's Conan O'Brien. That simulcast America's Nazi hunting director of INGLORIOUS BASTERDS, and KILL [hurricane] BILL, all decked out in an African brown shirt and Scotish beret.

Kennedy's death will carve Tuesday's new $9,000,000,000,000 deficit pork number into his oversized tombstone forever. And mark the end to the new beast's illegal 666 medical fasciation fantasies.

Cat napping late Tuesday, I dreamed that the clock read 11:00 pm. So I reached over for my remote to watch TMZ, but was jolted awake by the Lord, who said simply "Stiffed!" Seeing it was 11:02, I reached over for the remote and tuned into the show. Where I saw their first clip featuring Miss Australia, in some beauty contest, blowing up a lubed condom into a big balloon.

Turned out, she was the blonde babe who drove by me at JIFFY LUBE Tuesday afternoon, in a custom bone white MINI COOPER with 'TINKBIG' plates. Where the guys were holding up their large "$10 OFF" signs, signifying the big central government icon, Alexander Ham/ilton, on the US $10 bill of Egypt and Sodom.

Kennedy became a stiff on Tuesday in confirmation of my clockwork orange cock dream. This is the big boner scene where Alex suddenly shows up inside that plush country porno health spa. Startling the cat woman, who is extremely shocked by the fact that GSR/TWNers seem to be showing up everywhere. As if crawling through her rear windows, or just walking in the locked front door.

Tuesday morning I watched 1982's miracle box office indie comedy, EATING RAOUL. It took forever to get past the film's opening Barack Obama sequence. Wherein the wine shop owner, in a Hawaiian shirt, symbolically shoots the black robber standing by a bunch of cheap MOUNTAIN BROOK red wine bottles from Colorado, with his big DIRTY HARRY 44. Only a moment after we see little Obama, and yours truly in hidden shades, drop a Hollywood television on top of some naive federal postman. After the shot of a typical white Hollywood chick hugging her big black weenie, etc. etc.

The fantasticly brilliant prophecy has Raoul playing both the rod of Jesse, and his Providentially useful sidekick, Barack Obama. Who work together to seduce the film's sexy Keira Knightley figure look alike, named Mary, away from her suspicious platonic husband friend.

Mary's jealous conservative hubby tries everything to get rid of Obama. First using religious threats, then claiming that his birth certificate is a forgery, and lastly, making him out to be a homosexual, who can't get it up for the ladies. In the end, it's up to the Keira figure to get rid of her professional thief, who believes in forced love.

Yours,
Gregory Scott Relf
TWO WITNESSES NEWSLETTER

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